So it seems like most people think getting kicked is just part of being a horse vet. Might be true, but it seems like I only get kicked when I do dumb things. Dumb things like try to ultrasound a horse while it is in a trailer and has clearly made me understand it isn't going along with the plan.When I was a new graduate from vet school at my first job, appointments would be scheduled for horses to haul in to the clinic. That would have been fine, except the clinic was right in town and we were not allowed to unload the horses. Any work that needed to be done had to be done in the trailer. It was summer time and a fair number of these haul in appointments were for pregnancy exams. To determine pregnancy in a horse they can be ultrasounded to visualize the embryo between 14 and 20 days after the last breeding. The scary part is the the ultrasound exam is done rectally. Yes, that means a big plastic sleeve and lots of lube. Because horses are so big, and ultrasounds can only penetrate so far the ultrasound probe needs to be held in the vet's hand rectally. Then the scanning is done through the rectal wall and down towards the uterus.
On this particular morning I was the only doctor working. I have had a full morning of appointments and have just this one ultrasound to finish. The office gets a call about a horse in a barn 30 minutes away that has reared up and hit it's head before falling over backwards unconscious. It is really serious for a horse to hit it's head so hard that it becomes unconscious. I promise to go see it just as soon as I finish the last appointment.
The horse for the pregnancy exam arrives late and I rush out with the ultra
sound machine. It's a little Arab mare in a 2 horse straight load trailer. These are the trailers that you can actually see the horse's tails hanging out the back of sometimes on the road. I can't really get in the trailer next to the horse because of the divider, so I climb up on the very back of the trailer behind the mare and start to palpate her before ultrasounding. Palpating first is necessary both to remove manure from the rectum and to get a feel for where the ovaries and uterus are. The mare tries to wiggle away, but can't because the trailer is so small. I keep having problems hanging onto the back edge of the trailer because there is so little room and having to step back down to the pavement. I persist and the mare gets more annoyed, until she fires a hind hoof at my legs and just grazes my knee leaving a green poop smear on my pants. I figure if I just get the ultrasound done quickly she will be fine and I can get going to see that unconscious horse. So I pick up the ultrasound probe and climb back onto the edge of the trailer. About this time my husband stops by to see how things are going.
sound machine. It's a little Arab mare in a 2 horse straight load trailer. These are the trailers that you can actually see the horse's tails hanging out the back of sometimes on the road. I can't really get in the trailer next to the horse because of the divider, so I climb up on the very back of the trailer behind the mare and start to palpate her before ultrasounding. Palpating first is necessary both to remove manure from the rectum and to get a feel for where the ovaries and uterus are. The mare tries to wiggle away, but can't because the trailer is so small. I keep having problems hanging onto the back edge of the trailer because there is so little room and having to step back down to the pavement. I persist and the mare gets more annoyed, until she fires a hind hoof at my legs and just grazes my knee leaving a green poop smear on my pants. I figure if I just get the ultrasound done quickly she will be fine and I can get going to see that unconscious horse. So I pick up the ultrasound probe and climb back onto the edge of the trailer. About this time my husband stops by to see how things are going. It's pretty obvious how this is going to turn out. I could just stop writing now. These days I would slow down and find a safer way to finish the ultrasound, probably with some sedation. Unfortunately it took awhile to learn to move slower when the horses are anxious even if it destroys my schedule.
So I attempt the ultrasound and the mare lets me have it. She connects right in my groin and shoots me out the back of the trailer. My husband saves the day by catching me and preserving the $5000 ultrasound probe that I am still holding in my hand. I never did find out if that mare was pregnant or not. I think the owners felt pretty bad, but really I missed my chance when she just grazed me, it was my fault.
I was young and dumb. I went to see the unconscious horse before I went to the ER.
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